Old Version

Spring finally arrived in Beijing after the generation-long winter the capital endures, in which people are born, get married and vegetate into middle age in the months between the last warm autumn day and the first warm day of spring.

My new exercise program has helped me lose weight, made me irresistible to women, improved my relationship with my fiancée, and gets me out of the house twice a day, rain or shine. I call it the “Walk The Alaskan Malamute Or It Will Destroy The House” program.

It was bad enough that her daughter was marrying a professional banjo player who did not own his own flat or car. It was untenable that her daughter was living without a refrigerator

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A middle-aged police officer decided not to wait for high-tech equipment, like a safe ladder, and scrambled up in his loafers, followed by a firefighter. “Nothing here,” they exclaimed. It was pretty embarrassing. They left

China has to be one of the most “convenient” places in the world. It prides itself on convenience, in many senses of the word. Making things easy is part of the national psyche.

I noticed she was taking a photo of me as soon as she sat down.